Where has it all gone?

Nervousness fills my body and numbs every sense I have,

Time passes like days and seconds simultaneously,

The same evanescent thought looping my sanity,

Shaking in my heart, what is this, profanity of insanity?

Light headed and stars filling the night,

Lifeless tone drifting to an action-less slumber,

Waiting for this question-less answer,

My thoughts seem to wonder further and further,

Frozen in a trance with numbed thoughts and somber emotions,

Am I really just going to let these emotions take over my every thought and movement?

Or will this fright tire and leave my like the night chasing the day,

Beyond my grasping reach until I can’t go any further,

Held down by these chains of gravity,

And right when I least expect it, it’s all gone.

The feeling numbing my every sense,

These over whelming emotions,

Was it better to have been lost and scared,

Those feelings may seem like nothing,

But were they better than what I currently have, nothing,

Or am I fooled, deceived and lied to,

Were they just pain or something to learn by,

A tool of wisdom and misleading corruption,

A monster only to be forgotten and locked away,

Like an abomination,

Or am I deceiving myself,

Iridescently evanescent thoughts that guided me,

Or silver tongued devils misguiding me.

Each days these emotions just becomes even further nullified,

Are they disappearing or eating me alive,

Like a parasitic infestation?

Or are they trying to save me,

Like the next breath after drowning?

And then I turn away and wonder,

Where has it all gone?
~Micah Perino~